I have come to the conclusion that I am fashion challenged. I have been invited to the Horizon’s HumanFirst Gala this weekend. It is billed as a black tie optional event but I get the feeling that it would not be acceptable to wear jeans and a mock turtle neck. Hey, that’s what I wear on special occasions! I’m not used to these fancy-smancy events. Though I am quite comfortable in a grand social setting I still prefer to be comfortable. Wearing a monkey suit just doesn’t suit me. So my main goal today will be to find a nice button down shirt to match those fabulous shoes I bought while I was in Italy. Those are some hot shoes! I will have to take a picture and post them.

I think I will start my shopping excursion at the thrift store. You never know what goodies you can find there from day to day. The next place I will try is K-Mart. I figure they are hurting so bad that the prices there will be worth the visit And let's not mention the variety of clothing in that place. No, let's not mention it. If I can’t find anything at either of those places then I might try a fancy place like Target. You know Target is owned by the same company that owns Marshall Fields. Target just screams class! Everyone from Lincoln Park shops there so that tells me something...Yeah, I’m sure I can find something appropriate at one of these places!

Since I don't really have anything to report today I thought I would post the response I received from Onebox last week. For those of you who aren't familiar with the whole Onebox debacle, Onebox is a free web based e-mail service that also provided voice mail as a free service. This service was advertised as "Free e-mail for life" until recently when they started charging for the service. I sent them a nasty gram and they sent me this reply:

Greetings Paul,

Thank you for contacting Onebox Support.

We had initially intended to provide the Onebox service as a free
service forever, economic conditions have changed and we can no longer
provide the level of service you expect without charging.

The original Terms of Service that all users are required to review and
agree to before signing up specify that Onebox can terminate the service
or change the terms at any time.

Regards,

David B.
UC Technical Support

This is why it is so important to review your EULA (End User License Agreement) because companies will cower behind that thing every time the heat gets turned up. I'm sure this company will go on to do great things. You can really see how much they care about the little people.

One thing is for sure, I have to learn not to answer the phone when I just wake up. I went out last night because I’m unemployed and I can do that. Sorry for all you people that can’t stay out until 3AM on a Tuesday night but you have to take the good with the bad. Anyway, it’s 9AM and I’m just rolling over for another10 winks when the phone rings. I was so excited to get a call that wasn’t from a telemarketer that I actually answered the call. Of course there was a career recruiter on the other end who wanted to know all about me and what I did during my last position. For some reason the words just don’t flow as well when you have been out until 3AM. I couldn’t even remember what the hell my last title was! Fortunately she understood and I will be going to her office tomorrow. Who knows, maybe this is the recruiter for me.

I’m just glad to be getting calls. I’ve been handing out this damn resume like a cheap whore gives away ass for the past six months and I am just now starting to get callbacks. Now let’s see if I can get some interviews. I’m sure I will have to brush up on my interviewing skills. I get the feeling I won’t get a job if I’m out until 3AM the night before and I walk into the interview smelling like a 5’9” Brandy and Coke and a pack of cigarettes!

OMG! Can you believe IBM just called me and they want me to take over management of a 10,000 PC operating system upgrade project. The project is suppsed to last between 2 and three years. I would be able to hire my own core staff and would be working directly under the CIO. How cool is that!?!?

APRIL FOOL!!!

Now that I've had my little fun. Let's talk about Easter. I live between two churches. One Catholic and the other is Serbian Eastern Orthodox. Didn't even know there were Serbians in the neighborhood. Anyway, mass was massive. There were more cars parked illegally on my block than on a regular Sunday. Can I tell you that they park directly in the MIDDLE of the street? No lie. For some reason it’s OK to park illegally on Sunday if you are going to church but just let me forget to move my car when the street cleaner comes and I get a $50 ticket. What the hell is up with that? I’m a homeowner now and I think that gives me the right to bitch whether it’s a legitimate bitch or not. I pay taxes, damnit!

The other observation I had was while I was over my folks house. Ms. Ruthie made Easter dinner. It’s always good. So my dad, Ms. Ruthie and I are sitting around the table and those two had me crying with laughter. They both hate each other’s hometown. My dad is from a small town in Arkansas and Ruthie is from a small town in Mississippi. They were going back and forth about how the other town didn’t have anything. “Your town doesn’t have a mall.” “Well, your town doesn’t even have a downtown!” This went on for several minutes. So I just had to pipe in with, “You are both from back water Po-dank towns. My hometown is Chicago and there is plenty to do here.” I think I won that one. :-)